Frequently Asked Questions

What is Video Mirror Feedback?

It’s the coaching method that evolved out of my career as a documentary filmmaker and interviewer. It gives career seekers and business professionals a cost-effective, convenient way to polish the communication side of their career search and professional development from the inside out.

We use brief video clips of your interactions with me to improve awareness of your “inner landscape” and your impact on others. Thanks to technology such as Skype, I offer Video Mirror Feedback coaching anywhere in the world there’s a wifi connection.

I’ve used VMF on myself, so I know firsthand that seeing and hearing myself from the perspective of employers, colleagues, direct reports, and clients opened my eyes fast to the impact of choices that I hadn’t been aware I was making.

Observing your interactions with my constructive, empathetic guidance quickly trains you to create and maintain your work relationships more effectively. This makes VMF ideal for relationship and couples coaching as well.

How did you come up with this idea?

The spark of the idea came when I discovered that watching myself on video was helping me ask clearer, more concise questions.  This insight led to noticing that each one of my communications is a choice – and that my choices are a lot more productive when I’m mindful of them. From there, I developed and tested a structured approach to helping people learn to “choose their communication before it chooses them.” I’m grateful to the Five College Women’s Studies Research Center for sponsoring my research and supervision by Dr. Pat Romney in 2008.

What benefits will I gain from Video Mirror Feedback?

  • Improve your conversation skills and ability to give and read social cues
  • Boost your job performance by increasing your emotional intelligence
  • Prepare on a deep level for an interview
  • Revise and practice a public talk with a seasoned thought partner
  • Discover how you may be contributing to misunderstandings and conflicts
  • Develop unshakeable confidence in your ability to think on your feet
  • Practice a challenging conversation and get constructive feedback
  • Resolve a recurring problem or dilemma
  • Discover how to let go of old habits that may be holding you back
  • Move beyond the dread of creating your own website video–and make it with my support
  • Make changes fast—and for good

What does a VMF session look like?

No session is “typical” since every VMF program is tailored to the individual client, couple, or work team. Each session is held on Skype. This allows us to work face to face and have the option of video-recording the interactions and role plays that are helping us evoke the desired outcome or behavior change.  Each session begins with a centering minute and a chance to review your purpose. How has it evolved since we last week?

Each VMF session includes a careful blend of Psychosynthesis coaching and mentoring with tools I’ve gleaned from numerous communication trainings (including Intercultural, Conscious, Non-Violent), plus Mindfulness, Reflective Agreement Process, Relational Presence, Focusing, Yoga, Mediation, Improv, and Hospice Volunteer Training.

The more we watch key moments from the videos we make together, the more you literally see yourself meeting your own expectations and then surpassing them. Before each session wraps up, we reinforce your insights and agree on the interactions or behavior shifts you plan to apply in the coming week – and beyond!

How much time do I need to commit?

Each program is a commitment of 10 or 20 weekly sessions. Our meetings are 75 minutes on Skype. It’s also possible to upgrade to meetings that are two hours long.

What are your fees?

We’ll discuss these in a no-charge initial consultation. I have a rates for companies and for private individuals (or couples) who are paying out-of-pocket.

Can we have a conversation first to get acquainted and ask a few questions?

Yes, each coaching relationship starts with a no-charge 20-minute phone consultation. We’ll discuss the communication challenges you’re facing and the results you want from the training and coaching program that I will customize for you.

Are sessions confidential?

Yes, 100% private and confidential. I adhere to the principles of ethical practice embodied in Code of Ethics of the National Board for Certified Counselors.

Will watching myself be difficult?

Clients consistently say that the insight and results they gained was well worth the first few minutes of awkwardness. Before any recording takes place, we carefully explore any concerns you have about being recorded and/or watching yourself. You decide when you’re ready.

Most clients are surprised by positive qualities they never noticed in themselves. After a few minutes in the  atmosphere of “unconditional positive regard” we create, most people recognize old thought patterns that contribute to whatever has been bothering them or holding them back. Often, a certain laugh, gesture, or eye movement become clues to the unconscious patterned thinking that has been limiting your life.

Is there support between sessions?

Yes. We use brief emails or phone calls to help you put the inner shifts you experienced with me into daily practice by making new communication choices.

What happens to the video clips I record with Carlyn?

Most people ask me to keep their clips to refer to at our next meeting. You always have the option of directing me to delete them before the end of our meeting. There is no reason for me to keep clips that you don’t want me to keep.

What if I’ve never used Skype?

I will help you learn to use Skype. It’s surprisingly easy and will take just a few minutes to learn. Skype is the most powerful and convenient way I’ve found to offer this highly customized form of communication coaching.


Video Mirror Feedback

You can literally see it working!